Tags
discomfort, healing, higher self, hollow bone, loneliness, path, shaman, shamanism, spiritual growth, will
I have been struggling with whether or not to actually write this post. It is not that the work I am doing is not valid, it is that I have been doubting the validity of my feelings. Let me explain.
I am on a Shamanic Path. I have amazing guides who have been teaching me and moving me forward. Most recently, they have been showing me the various layers I need to peel away in order to become fully realized on this path. The precipice is right in front of me, and as such, I am feeling a great deal of discomfort.
In our lives, feeling this discomfort and working through to the other side is what gives us the freedom and strength to follow our True Purpose and live the life we came here to live. It allows us to follow our Higher Self, our Will.
So what is it I am struggling with? I am feeling lonely and sad. I understand that there is much to be learned here, and I am learning those lessons. However, I am embarrassed to feel this way. I have friends who would chastise me for this, because I am blessed with a husband and children that are amazing and wonderful. However that does not change how I am feeling right now, and so I am embarrassed that I have been feeling this way recently.
Spiritually, I know where this feeling resides, and why it is here. I know the growth that is required of me, and I am willing to do the work. In fact, I am doing the work, which is why it is surfacing in this manner. I have given myself permission to feel it, to be with it, and to come out on the other side of it where great rewards await me.
I thank my guides and ancestors for this acceleration in my growth.
All feelings are valid in and of themselves and you should never feel embarrassed by them! I have the same problem where I doubt the validity of my emotions and it’s usually because my rational brain is trying drive. That’s all well and good when I’m balancing my checkbook, solving a problem or trying to learn mathematical theory. This work is the domain of emotion and spirit. So whatever you are feeling shouldn’t embarrass you.
(I realize that’s the same thing you said there at the end but I wanted to reinforce it!)
Hope your spirits lift soon! Looking forward to Friday!
The feelings that sweep through us as we move around the wheel are not something we can control. What we can control, however, are our reactions to these feelings and what we are able to learn from them.
I read something once that may or may not help. I forget the source, perhaps it was a book by Alan Watts. It was said of a Zen master that “His feelings move across his face like the changing of the seasons.”
So often, we look at those who’ve “made it”, and see them not as they are, (living, breathing, feeling human beings) but as we expect them to be (creatures of pure spirit unmoved by emotion and living only on air).
Because of this, we often fault ourselves when we experience human feelings like sadness, anger, jealousy…
If we are, as Terrance McKenna says, the fingers, toes and sex organs of God, then it is our job to feel these things. But as the hand can’t hold what it feels when it touches something, and the ear can’t hold the sound it hears, we have to allow these things to pass through us without hanging onto them. Only then can we truly become the hollow bones we need to be in order that our people may live.
Peace and light…
Beautifully said, and exactly what I needed to hear at this moment. Thank you.